A Musical Dot.Comedy

For information, please contact Dave Schroeder
dschroeder @mindspring.com


The act opens with Steve, the earnest but immature CEO-to-be, getting A Great Idea in his garage. Why not create a web site to sell knock-offs of top European designer fashions to average Americans and cut the designers in on the profits? His best friend Bob, a stylish sales rep, soon joins him for a duet, You Think It--I'll Sell It! Steve and Bob adjourn to a local coffee shop and meet Liz, a hardworking MBA. The three of them tell what they think it takes to be successful entrepreneurs, singing Luck and Sweat and Style. Liz helps the guys get their business plan together soon enough to present it to Gil Buckston, a noted venture capitalist, who stops by with his entourage and raps on how to make Bucks Bucks Bucks before giving the Softwear.com team ninety million dollars in startup funding. Jubilant, Steve, Bob, and Liz return to the garage and start hiring.

Liz recruits Dot as their office manager, and they sing
I Could Tell You to explain why working for a dotcom is so special. Bob and Steve go for another coffee run and fantasize about the Softwear.com Fashion Show--a big production number complete with swimsuit and lingerie models. Steve can't stop thinking about Liz and pictures her in several tasteful ensembles. The guys return to the garage to meet Gil's proposed executive management candidates. Jasmine, the VP of Marketing candidate, overwhelms everyone with a showstopper, "That's Marketing!" and breezes out. A Hell's Angel type rides up on a motorcycle and Steve is afraid he's the new Chief Technology Officer candidate, but instead he's looking for his son, Chip, a 14-year-old technical genius, who rides up on a Razor scooter and sings a 50s-inspired boogie, "Go C.T.O."

Following two big numbers we meet Conner, a fast-talking salesman who tries to get on Dot's good side. She likes him, but doesn't like his high-pressure sales tactics and tells him so in their bantering duet, "You Name It--I've Got It." Steve is itching to spend big money on something really impressive for their new corporate headquarters and everyone contributes their ideas in the first act finale, "The Taj Mahal."


Cast of Characters
Steve Childs, mid-20s A CEO with a great idea
Bob Sellers, mid-20s Steve's best friend & Sales VP
Liz Good, mid-20s A dedicated MBA student
Gilford M. Buckston, 40s Venture Capitalist
"Dot" Newell, early 20s Receptionist & Office Manager
Jasmine Jones, 40s+ VP of Marketing
Charles "Chip" Kidd, 14 Chief Technology Officer
Katerina Sforza, 29+ Italian fashion designer
Conner Mann, early 20s A persistent salesman
At least 6 men and 6 women, singers and dancers.
Brass quintet: 2 trumpets, trombone, baritone, tuba
Plus keyboards and percussion
Softwear.com the Musical,
including 19 original songs
is available for production.


The act opens in Softwear.com's expensive new headquarters filled with privileged web developers who sing that management ought to be "Glad I Took This Job!" Conner complains that Dot won't buy anything from him and she tells him the only thing she's interested in is Softwear.com. Steve is caught playing computer games instead of working, and then cheerfully writes hundreds of checks to a cautionary counterpoint from Liz in "Sign Sign Sign." Chip shows off a new invention--a pink t-shirt with built-in sensors to monitor heart rate, respiration, and so on, that can tell if a developer needs more caffeine to maintain peak productivity.

Bob has been in Italy wooing fashion designers and has just returned with Katerina, a talented Milan designer. Bob learns from Liz that he's likely to be worth well over a hundred million dollars when Softwear.com goes public and sings "A Hundred-Millionaire." Katerina warns him not to be too naive and trusting with her interleaved slow ballad, "You Innocent Young Lamb."

Steve, Bob, Liz, and Jasmine frenetically sing "Road Show / IPO" as they visit 25 investor groups in 18 cities over 10 days to promote their IPO. At the end of the song Liz collapses and the guys carry her to Steve's hotel room. Bob leaves to meet Katerina and Steve sits by the soundly sleeping Liz and sings "I Could Tell Her" how much he loves her if only she didn't report to him. Exhausted himself, he falls asleep by her side. After an awkward awakening in Steve's hotel room we return to company headquarters for a simultaneous site launch and IPO party. Thanks to Jasmine's high priced marketing, the company's stock goes through the ceiling when it launches and Gil and his fellow VCs cash out.

Then everything falls apart. There are more bugs than revenues, as the developers rap in "Bugs Bugs Bugs." Steve, Bob, and Liz are left with worthless options and a penniless company. Steve begs Gil for more money, but Gil sings, "You'll have to go bankrupt--Pink slip them all!" Liz muses over a salad at lunch that she's "Twice as Good as a Man," but doesn't have much of a life. She cares deeply about Steve, but he's all play and no work. Steve resignedly calls a company meeting and informs everyone that Softwear.com is closing its doors. While the developers are packing up their desks everyone sings about "grand dreams" of "oversized cash streams" in the melancholy ballad, "Dot Dot Dot."

Conner and Gil then march on stage--clearly having just concluded a business deal. Conner has purchased the bankrupt company from Gil and gives it to Dot on the condition that she'll marry him. Dot gleefully accepts and the two of them put their heads together to talk privately. Bob and Katerina enter, announcing that they've just gotten married and plan to have lots of bambinos.

Steve realizes that Liz no longer reports to him and asks her to marry him. Liz loves him, but won't marry him, because he's all play and no work. Dot and Conner then offer Liz and Steve jobs with the new Softwear.com as CFO and VP of New Product Development. Liz says that Steve was a terrible CEO, but now understands he was just in the wrong job. As a VP of New Products, when he's playing, he's working! She accepts his proposal. Steve has a great idea for Softwear.com's new products. He'll use Chip's t-shirt sensor technology to make smart baby clothes, using Katerina's designs, to track kids' vital signs over the web. It's acclaimed as a great idea. All sing an a capella reprise of "A Great Idea."


Copyright (c) 2002 by Dave Schroeder